My Ordered Idolatry

I wake up and begin preparation for my daily devotions. I routinely eat my granola bar and drink plenty of water so that I will be able to properly worship the body gods, through a morning workout. The morning workout devotion is a staple for those who worship the body gods. It is in the mundane and routine daily devotions that one grows physically. After all, have you ever regretted a workout?Spiritual training is of some value, but physically training shows tangible results. The body gods are always faithful to bless their followers with a runner's high, more energy, or a good appetite for their devotion.

Once morning worship is complete I then seek to make a sacrifice to another god in my life, my stomach. Much of my days is spent pondering how I will best serve the stomach god, how much to offer it, when, where, what? As I sit in the office I imagine exactly what I will eat when I get home. When the moment of sacrifice finally comes I can feel my mouth watering as I enter the pantry, it has been a long time since my last sacrifice, the stomach god is anticipating a good offering. I will seek to fill him until he overflows.

On my way home from work I always listen to a sermon. Colin Cowherd and Paul Finebaum are my favorite prophets. They pass judgment on the sports franchises that need to be judged, offer hope to the down trodden teams, and preach the good news of "a team gets what you put in." Their works based theology is sound, and their prophetic predictions are uncanny. They comfort me with words like, "Nick Saban is my coach, I shall not want." Their preaching inspires me to dig into the sport for myself, instead of taking an analyst's words on faith. What more could one ask from a preacher?

As my day comes to a close I open up the captivating words of the latest novelist I am reading. As I make my way through the inspired pages I highlight, underline, and dog ear the portions that stick out to me. As I read these novels I feel like I begin to know the author and all his brilliance, even his character is displayed in his written word. This writing causes me to reflect on my own life and inspires me to live a more violent, sexualized, and bigoted life. After all, the words of the novelist are sharp.

I am very intentional with sleep. I find that I constantly seek him out, spending quality time with him, even before any other cares of this world. Should a person need me, work's demands be left unmet, or class work incomplete, I am always quick to drop these things to spend time with sleep. Sleep is a comfort to me, he pursue me as much as I pursue him. And, of course, sleep prepares me to worship the body gods the next morning.